Mini Cooper Vs Seat Ibiza Vs Suzuki Swift Sport: Which Car Wins Our Battle Of The Hatchbacks?

When we arrived at the shoot location, we all thought we’d be better off testing boats, not cars. It was one of the coldest, wettest and windiest days the good old British weather system could have possibly thrown at us. But with the three zingy hatchbacks with modest power and high fun potential at our disposal, there wasn’t a worry among us; we’d still be able to thrash the hell out of this trio and live to tell the tale.

That’s what’s great about ‘warm’ hatches. You can use every bit of performance they have on offer without losing your license or ending up upside down in a hedge. But if that’s the sort of car you’re after, which should you go for? With a 1.4-litre Seat Ibiza FR and a Suzuki Swift Sport on our long-termer fleet, we chucked an interloper into the mix, the new five-door Mini Cooper, to see what’s what. They all have similar power outputs sent to the front wheels and have starting prices under £17,000.

Each goes about its business a little differently: the Seat is a turbocharged four-pot with cylinder deactivation technology, the Mini has a fizzy turbo three-pot, while the Suzuki packs a good old fashioned naturally-aspirated unit. Let battle commence.

Suzuki Swift Sport

We’ve been running this little Swift for a month and a half now, and have fallen in love with its cheeky looks and lively drive. As it’s the only car here that’s naturally aspirated, it’s necessary to wind the 1.6-litre engine all the way up to 7000rpm to get the most out of it. Hardly a chore. On paper it’s supposed to do 0-62mph in 8.7 seconds, a long way off the Mini and the Seat, which (officially) do the same in 8.2 and 7.8 seconds respectively. But it feels brisker than that.

Show it a corner, and the fun continues. There’s a little roll, but grip is good, and the steering feels nice and natural, if a little slow. What’s less fun is the interior; it’s pretty miserable in there. Jump in the Swift and you’re greeted with a sea of cheap grey plastics, and a lofty driving position that’s difficult to get comfortable in.

It’s worth noting, though, that it’s by far the cheapest here. To buy the Mini you’ll need £15,900, while the Seat is £16,660. The Swift? Just £14,495. And you won’t need to tick any options boxes on top of that, as sat-nav, cruise control and most other modern-day ‘essentials’ are included in that price.

Mini Cooper

After driving down to our windswept photo shoot location in the Swift, I immediately hopped in the Mini. Wow, what a difference. In a stark contrast to the Suzuki’s low-rent cabin, the Mini’s is properly plush. The materials give off a premium feel you just don’t usually get inside cars of this segment.

There’s a substantial, cocooning dashboard, and fabulously exquisite toggle switches dotted around that look like something out of an aircraft cockpit. You just want to press them for the sake of it. The stereo’s brilliant, and the central display screen has some funky lights around it which change colour depending on what controls you’re fiddling with. Slightly pointless, but a nice touch.

It definitely has the best cabin here, and it also has the best chassis. Even while driving it hard in the miserable weather we experienced, the traction control didn’t often flicker into life. The other two cars frequently span up the front wheels causing their nannying TC systems to pipe up, but the Mini has far higher levels of grip. It feels a lot more under control, too, with barely a whiff of body roll.

However, there’s one aspect that undoes all the greatness of that chassis: the engine. It’s devoid of almost any excitement. It isn’t all that responsive, is far too quiet, and doesn’t have any satisfying turbocharged shove in its repertoire.

This uninspiring 1.5-litre comes close to spoiling the whole car, and that’s before you get to the Mini’s other, smaller niggles. Thankfully, you can - and should - spec the Mini without the pointlessly small arm rest that gets in the way of the handbrake when it’s folded back, but something you’re stuck with is the cringey ‘fun’ bits that have been added.

The messages like ‘Maximum Go-Kart Feel’ and ‘Typical Mini Driving Fun’ that flash up on the screen when you change between driving modes make you sigh every time they appear, and the little graphic of a ‘winking’ Mini that appears on ignition is just lame. I can’t figure out why Mini thought it necessary to add this stuff.

I’m also not a fan of the looks, particularly on the five-door with its stretched wheelbase. The front really isn’t a pretty sight, with that ungainly overhang and as a CT reader once aptly pointed out, the bar in the middle of the grille makes it look like it’s ‘stuffing a biscuit into its mouth horizontally.’ You’re also expected to pay quite a lot for what’s arguably the least attractive modern Mini of the three generations. Sure, the starting price of £15,900 may be lower than the Ibiza FR’s £16,660, but if you option the former to the spec of the latter, you’ll need just under £18,000. Our test car was specced up to a mad £21,250. Cripes.

Seat Ibiza FR

I wasn’t sure what to expect from the Ibiza. Unlike some of my colleagues, I hadn’t spent any time behind the wheel of the supermini before this triple test. It doesn’t have a sporting dynasty behind its name like the Mini Cooper, and even rolling on 17-inch alloys, the FR looks quite unassuming. My expectations lowered further when slipping into the dull - albeit well put-together - cabin, but, I was happy to discover that this thing’s a hoot to drive.

That 1.4-litre four-pot is a gem, with a properly punchy mid-range and a rorty exhaust note that simply doesn’t seem right for such a small engine. The chassis - while not as accomplished as the Mini’s - is great, with low body roll and confidence-inspiring feedback. The steering meanwhile is supremely well-judged in terms of directness and weight.

I do wish there was a little more visual drama on the outside and a little more spice on the inside (and I’d also like a proper integrated sat-nav rather than the aftermarket-looking thing you’re lumbered with), but unlike the Mini, the Ibiza is a hard car to find fault with. It does everything really rather well.

Conclusion

The first thing to get out of the way here is the big disappointment: the Mini. After driving the Cooper S earlier this year and being left wanting, I was hoping that the lower-powered standard Cooper would hit a sweeter spot, but it just didn’t. It’s fabulous inside and would certainly be the easiest to live with out of the three cars here, but if you’re looking for fun, you’ll find the entertainment value severely hampered by that dull engine.

The Swift is a much more entertaining package, and for the price is an utter bargain, but it’s not the one I’d go for, with steering that’s a little too slow, and a plasticy cabin that’s not the nicest of places to spend extended periods of time. This leaves us with the Ibiza: the surprise package of the trio.

Other than the fact that it doesn’t look exciting inside or out, the Ibiza is a car that’s difficult to find fault with. The engine may be shouting all about its eco pretensions with that cylinder on demand tech, but the fact is it’s an absolute belter when you’re pressing on, and is married to a fantastic chassis.

The steering is the best of the three - it feels quicker than the Swift’s and there’s none of the weirdly artificial weight you’ll experience in the Mini. Most importantly, though, it’s the one I enjoyed the most. And enjoyment is exactly what these sorts of cars should be about.

Click here for a behind the scenes look at this photo shoot.